If you answer “yes” to any of the these questions then you’re in an unhealthy relationship:
- Are you with a guy you know is cheating on you?
- Are you with a guy who lies and somehow makes you feel bad?
- Are you with a guy who has drink and / or drug problem or any other addiction?
- What about a guy who yells at you, pushes or hits you?
Did you read my previous blog “Letting Go“?
I talked about letting go of physical possessions specifically relating to clothes and sentimental items. Clothes to ensure we only have items that make us look and feel good and sentimental items associated with ex-partners that can keep us attached to the past and prevent us from moving on by acting as reminders. In this blog I wish to look at the more serious topic of relationships that we may need to let go of…
It’s unlikely it’ll be easy for you to let go of your relationship, despite your boyfriend’s often horrible behaviour…
This is especially true if you’re in love with or have strong feelings for your boyfriend. But it’s necessary for your well-being and long term happiness. Some people are not good for you and create negativity and drama in your life.
Ellen Fein and Sherrie Schneider (authors of “The Rules” books) tell women not to expect a man to change or try to change him.
Sometimes it’s best to cut your losses and move on. Yes you may love him very much despite what’s going on BUT you deserve to be happy and find your Mr Right who will treat you well!
Don’t put up with poor behaviour.
Remember when you’re following “The Rules” you’re interviewing for your future husband. You become an observer, you take a step back and ask – is this guy marriage material? “Rules Girls” don’t waste time and we watch out for red flags (check ‘Buyer Beware’ chapters in “The Rules” books). “Rules Girls” don’t want to be with someone who doesn’t treat them well. Instead “Rules Girls” say “Next!” and move on.
“You trust in the abundance and goodness of the universe: if not him, someone better, you say.” (Fein & Schneider, 2000)
How to let go of or avoid getting into an unhealthy relationship: follow “The Rules”.
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You may not know this, but I’m a certified Rules Coach (trained by “The Rules” authors Ellen Fein and Sherrie Schneider) and I specialise in helping women apply “The Rules” to their specific circumstances. I help women set up an actionable plan of what they need to focus on to achieve the best results fast with “The Rules”. That means I’m available for one-on-one client work if that happens to be something you could use now (or in the near future). You can take a look at my services here.
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Disclaimer: Information, advice & tips provided by Debbie Sedgley Rules Coach are based on “The Rules” books written by Ellen Fein & Sherrie Schneider and are not a substitute for professional advice such as a Medical Doctor, Psychiatrist, Counsellor or Legal representative. Information is offered in good faith – you do not have to use this information. Any decisions you make, and the consequences thereof are your own. The Rules relationship and dating advice is not scientifically proven and there are no formal studies to prove it works, therefore Deborah Sedgley cannot guarantee results.