How to believe in the magic of love

One of the questions I received from a reader on the blog here was “how can I be patient with The Rules when my friends have boyfriends or are married? How to believe in the magic of love?”

This is a great question and one I feel has the answers within it.

Perhaps you feel down that your friends seem to be happily in love in their relationships and like you’re the only single one left? You might be feeling a bit sad and despondent? But actually the best thing to do is to change your mind. Ellen and Sherrie teach women to be happy for their female friends and family when things are going well for them. They say to recognise that they have likely worked hard and put effort in. So this is the first step. Perhaps you think they haven’t put much effort in? Oftentimes we don’t realise the work that goes in unless we ask. Your friend may have made lots of effort to socialise even when she didn’t feel like it. She may have followed The Rules and made effort with her appearance by eating carefully, exercising and researching what hair, clothes and make up look good on her.

Next to address is how to believe in the magic of love? Well those same friends and family who are in relationships and married can be your source of inspiration. Look around and you’ll find plenty of examples. Perhaps it’s your grandparents (always fun to ask them how they met!) or maybe it’s your parents, siblings, best friend, cousins etc…

Ask people how they met and how long they’ve been together. Notice the Rulesy relationships versus non-Rulesy ones and which ones have more difficulties. Write these sources of inspiration in your journal and mark them for easy reference for when you need a reminder!

Finally, have you lost faith due to bad experiences and / or perhaps you don’t feel good about yourself or worthy of love? Maybe it’s time to work on your self esteem. You are enough and you do deserve love. Take steps to build yourself up and seek professional help from a psychotherapist if needed. Also, remember that the bad experiences are just part of our journey, many people have numerous disappointments before they meet the one but do your best not to lose your faith you will find someone. Your friends and family members who are in relationships probably went through difficult challenges just as you have. Use the law of attraction and know there’s someone out there for you, believe it!

For more blogs and tips from me visit my Facebook page: https://www.facebook.com/debbiesedgleyrulescoach/

Do you want help with dating and / or online dating? Have you got a difficult romantic problem and you don’t know which way to turn? Do you wonder how to apply The Rules to your specific situation? Have you had your heart broken one too many times and want to do things differently by following The Rules with the guidance of a Rules coach? Do you want to find your Mr Right and get married? I am certified as a Rules Book coach by the authors Ellen Fein and Sherrie Schneider. I am also a certified Neuro Linguistic Programming Master Practitioner. I offer a 100% money back guarantee if you are not satisfied with coaching with me. Email me at debbiesedgley@gmail.com for more information or to enquire about my services. Your can also check out the services I offer here.

#therules #rulesgirls #therulesbook #rulescoach #debbiesedgley #magicoflove #inspiration #behappyforothers #beinspiredbyotherslovestories #believeyoudeservelove

Online Dating – avoiding frustration by setting your expectations

People often tell me that online dating is extremely frustrating and I hear you. So what can you do about this? I think the main thing I would advise is to prepare yourself for a very, very high weeding rate. When doing online dating you are likely to attract all sorts of characters. They may just annoyingly like your profile and never do anything.

Realistically it’s best to expect a lot of time wasters that you will have to ignore or delete to find Mr Right. The good thing is if you follow The Rules for Online Dating you’ll eliminate many of these guys very quickly. By setting your expectations realistically you won’t feel so disappointed when you have to next or ignore a lot of these guys. If we consider Pareto’s law then expect at least 80% of the men who contact you to fall by the wayside as you quickly eliminate them by following The Rules for Online Dating. To be honest the weeding rate may be even higher than this, but persevere because with the 20% left you could find your Mr Right!

So how do you weed the time wasters? Here’s a summary from ‘The Rules for Online Dating’ by Ellen Fein and Sherrie Schneider:

  • Do not respond to messages or contact from guys that requires very little effort like winks, nudges and likes. These mean nothing. A guy might like every single girl online and see who takes the bait.
  • Form letters – these may not always be obvious at first but they are messages that can be copied and sent to anyone. They may at first seem very detailed and maybe even ask you about your hobbies and interests etc… so read and reread a message to ensure it can’t be duplicated. If in doubt ignore. If he really likes you nothing will stop him sending you another message and help you indicate whether it’s another form letter or a sincere message.
  • Guys who just want to chat. If he hasn’t asked you out by the fourth message then he’s a next!
  • Men who have more than two photos. This can indicate he’s very much into being online and not as likely to want a real relationship.
  • If a man doesn’t have a photo then if he sends you a genuine message you must ask for one from him. If he doesn’t send a photo and / or makes an excuse he’s a next! These guys are likely to have girlfriends / wives etc…
  • Men with player screen names. They are likely to be after one thing.
  • Men who send angry or sexual messages or won’t take no for an answer. These guys are trouble, red flag! They are very likely to have mega issues.
  • Your gut tells you something’s not right.

I’d also advise logging on just once a day or at certain times you set during the week. That way you will not be desperately checking your dating apps and sites all day. Go through systematically and delete / next! Keep going and stay positive! Sometimes things may be slow or you get a lot of time wasters but remember the next message could be from Mr Right!

For more blogs and tips from me visit my Facebook page: https://www.facebook.com/debbiesedgleyrulescoach/

Do you want help with dating and/ or online dating? Have you got a difficult romantic problem and you don’t know which way to turn? Do you wonder how to apply The Rules to your specific situation? Have you had your heart broken one too many times and want to do things differently by following The Rules with the guidance of a Rules coach? Do you want to find your Mr Right and get married? I am certified as a Rules Book coach by the authors Ellen Fein and Sherrie Schneider. I am also a certified Neuro Linguistic Programming Master Practitioner. I offer a 100% money back guarantee if you are not satisfied with coaching with me. Email me at debbiesedgley@gmail.com for more information or to enquire about my services. Your can also check out the services I offer here.

#therules #rulesgirls #therulesbook #rulescoach #debbiesedgley #onlinetips #ignoredeletenexttimewasters #getweeding #expecttimewasters #keepgoingtofindyourmrright